Carrots

Obviously! As there's not a crumb left… the sneaky rayana rabbit has struck again!
_____________________________________________
From: Rayloc
Sent: Tuesday, 29 May 2007 10:31 a.m.
To: TECH BI

Subject: RE: Chocolate on shelving on Level 3 - and muffins as well
And they are absolutely delicious! My personal favourite - carrot with pumpkin !!!
_____________________________________________
From: Bridget
Sent: Tuesday, 29 May 2007 9:56 a.m.
To: TECH BI
Subject: RE: Chocolate on shelving on Level 3 - and muffins as well


_____________________________________________
From: Nick
Sent: Tuesday, 29 May 2007 9:10 a.m.
To: TECH BI
Subject: Chocolate on shelving on Level 3 eom

Prison Break

This entry's a couple of days late but hey, I do have a life.

I believe this started when Logan joined us for lunch which eventually led to his story about his grandma who he calls once in a while for a quick chat. Grandma apparently has a bad memory as whenever she finishes her chat with Logan, she hangs up and forgets that Logan's still waiting on the line to talk to his mom.

Which led to Jared's story about their visit to Kate's grandmother who's been recently forced assigned to the local retirement villa.

As they were going about, Jared noticed two senior citizens trying to figure out how to open the access gates that littered the compound. Evidently, an old man on a mobility scooter was trying to get in and another on his walker was trying to go the other way. Like an antiquated game tug-of-war, one of them was struggling to pull and the other one was straining to get the gate to go his way.

Now I won't judge and tell you how easy it is to open a gate but I'm sure when I get to that age I might find it hard to work it all out, specially if another annoying person in a mobility scooter is trying to pull it the other way.

They were going at it for a couple of minutes when Kate finally caves in and says. "Why don't you go down there and help those two people with the gate?"

"Another chance to prove that I'm a real man." Jared thinks to himself, as he struts toward the two helpless citizens. "This should be no easier than polishing of a 20 piece KFC bucket."

He promptly comes up and proudly shows them how to work the pull on gate. "...and this is how you work this out gentlemen" he says, pulling the latch up and swinging the door with ease.

I could just imagine scooter boy breathe a huge sigh of relief as he rolls in and goes about his way.

Meanwhile, Jared was a bit puzzled as the other geezer on his walker seem to have quickly increased his hop as if in a hurry. The man must have noticed Jared's puzzled look as he says "I'm just going out for a walk son." punctuating it with a reassuring wink.

With that said, Jared let's the old man go about his way. Walking back though, he realised that it must have been a bad idea to let the man out. He then decides to go directly to reception and report the incident.

He barely finishes explaining himself when one of the shriveled female residents shrieks "Richard's making a runnah!!!"

I burst out laughing at this point as it just gave me an odd image of an elderly man hobbling across the lawn trying to make a break for it screaming "You'll never get me suckers!!!"

Well, unfortunately, the escapee didn't really go that far. Jared mentioned that he only went halfway across the lawn before a couple of interns tackled him to the ground.

Ah, I would have given anything to see the man's expression on his quick bid for freedom.

Come back here again

The stupidity and the ignorance of some people comes in batches.

11:51 Phone rings, it's Chris asking me out for lunch (well, not actually out, as it's a bit gloomy out, but definitely away from my desk.

11:52 I jump up from my desk, hop excitedly towards elevators, remember I'm now on a second floor and taking an elevator DOWN is way more than lame, I sigh and take the stairs slightly less excitedly.

11:53 Chris turns, sees me walk through the door like an angel with a purple halo (too much cauliflower) and starts to build up a wide grin from ear-to-ear to prepare himself for 20 minutes of "happy".

11:54 we notice Jane in a cafe, sleeping with her head in a newspaper. She wakes up when we both scream Hellos and starts giggling again. She kept giggling since I saw her this morning. This is how our meeting went.

Jane: How guys, so let's start, How is xx?
Phil: Fine. I got a 100,000 phone calls this Friday about some issue.
Jane: hehe, ok. How is yy?
Rayana: Fine and fine
Jane: hehe, ok. How is zz?

This is where the conversation became slightly heated as the opinions of a zz status were slightly different. With the white noise in the background Jane turns to me in a do-you-see-what-i-have-to-put-up-with look. Me being me interrupts everyone with a Jamaican accent: I hear your pain, sista!

This is where all went wrong (or right). Jane had burst out laughing with those little breaks in between that sound like tiny snorts, when you know it's real and it aint going nowhere until it all comes out.

Jane: hahahaa, heheheheh, how is heheheheh abcd, hahaha, abcd, ahhahah.
As soon as she stops everyone else laughs in amuzement and that just charges her up even more...

so any who.... she was still laughing at 12 when we saw her in a cafe. she blames me for that... typical.

We decided to have lunch in a cafe. Sitting in a cafe downstairs I stupidly started a topic of Writers and Readers festival that Chris and I looked at this morning and thought would be nice to culturally educate ourselves by going.

This gave Jane a big burst of energy, not counting the second cup of coffee she was having.

Jane: Oh, I'm going to that too! Do you know that so-and-so will be doing a presentation at this and this?

I turn to Chris to ensure his stare is as blank as mine and in unison we reply: No.

Jane: And, I'm also going to Matthew Collins' presentation about this and that.

Now I heard a familiar name: Oh is that the guy that has a gallery?

Jane: Not JUST that! he also wrote "a fancy name of the book Chris and I didn't dream of reading". Did you read that?

Chris and I just look at each other. Don't know what he's thinking, I'm thinking I need to keep my mouth shut about cultural activities in front of Jane, as I definitely don't know a tenth of what she's talking about. Not that I don't want to...

Jared just kept munching with a smart upper-thigh face he usually has when conversations stir away from body, diet, body diet and ballroom dancing.

(Whilst Jane was talking, I actually saw Jared grab the plastic knife and try cutting his wrists underneath the table. -- edited by Chris.)

Chris: Umm... khem-khem.. I just wanted something basic. you know... not for me, for my friend.



And that is how we realize how ignorant we are, kids. I'm still going to the writers fest, but I will now be on guard for Jane :).

WooHoo - we're bafling again!

I was so delighted to check bafl this morning and discover that there are new postings (thanks Mr Glass) and that Rayloc has returned with her musings!! Ok - so she was a bit wound up about not having purple cauliflower for dinner or something, but at least she is back :) Although - I still can't work out why she was at work at 7am (was that to escape from the possibility of being fed rainbow coloured porridge for breakfast?).

So Jared is obese? Was it a trainee nurse maybe? Did she have the wrong end of the instrument in her hand? Look - I know our Health System is in disarray, but clearly this nurse knows not what she does. This is more confusing to me than Mr Cullen's budget speach. Jared: I am not medically trained (well - I do tamper in the occassional psychiatric assistance department which is "come, let's go for a beer and talk about your issues") but you appear to me to be lean and muscular with no trace of fat. And yes, you do seem to have lovely thighs. So put this behind you and fire the nurse.

Yes Chris, I too went to the Boat Show . Oh man - did you go on board the Genesis and the Sea Rays? Sob. Tom bought a fishing rod and reel for the new soft baits. Maybe one day someone can explain why man needs an array of 10 rods and 10 reels to fish successfully? Give a girl a stick, some line and a hook, and she'll be fine. Or in Rayloc's case a squid jig and a torch :)

I have 4 more dentist appointments coming up. Having not been near a dentist in 15 years, things weren't too bad. I need to have my old fillings removed and replaced with fancy new ones. So I'm looking forward to having my new gnashers all sorted for when we meet up again for lunch. Not that pasta requires much gnashing!!

Tonight I'm making roast chicken and going to stuff orange slices under the skin. I have no idea why but it sounds interesting and I'm enjoying my kitchen - well it's more like a new experimental cooking laboratory than a kitchen at the moment. Fortunately I haven't exploded anything and most of the fires have been put out relatively quickly with no observable damage. Rayloc - I'm accompanying the roast chicken with BROWN gravy, GREEN peas, YELLOW corn, WHITE potatoes and WHITE cauliflower with YELLOW cheese sauce. I'm contemplating adding PURPLE beetroot but not sure at this point........

Love you all and miss you. See you soon :)

The Owl

Hey!

Heya Jenita,

I'm glad you still remember auckland and us! We all thought that you're soooo busy with your bf that you've already forgotten that there are other people other than aborigines, koalas and kangaroos.

You don't have to deny that you're pregnant. One of your friends kindly sent us a picture and we noticed that you're belly's beginning to grow rounder. =) or was it just the beer?

There's a lot of people going as well, Debbie, then Margaret, then Mark, and then Rayana got moved over to the 2nd floor! It's kinda sad, I'm actually thinking of putting an ad in the paper for anybody interested in joining us for lunch.

Jared's still alive, we lately had a health check and his results came back saying he was obese. I honestly cant believe it. I think the nurse got it wrong. I see him everyday and don't think he's that fat. =P

Rayana was moved down to lvl 2 coz she was so noisy distracting everybody. She has some new marketing friends now. She sometimes comes up to visit but not that often anymore. She actually came up this morning and stole some important hexadecimal number from Chris' desk! Grrrr!

Tony's wearing a headband lately. We suggested he use a scrunchie instead coz we really thought the company employed a new chick to manage core. He still rocks but we're sad lately that he might have to go soon.

Chris is really depressed as he went to the boat show yesterday and saw a lot of things he can't afford. He did end up buying a fishing rod just to make himself feel better. Now if only somebody teaches him how to fish...

All in all nothing eventful. It's still a bit warm compared to last year.

Regards,

baflbot

Word for the Day

Here's a new word / phrase I learnt today which I'm going to write down before I forget.

Upper Thigh:
Used to politely describe a person's biggest muscle.

e.g. Jared works hard to be the company's smart upper thigh.

Pissed Off

Yeah, I am.

It's 7:00am in the morning and I am in the office! All alone and very angry. A dangerous combination.

Don't call it the winter blues, cos I don't hear no music and don't see no blue. The sun is shining straight into my right eye, and I'm half-blind in addition to being pissed off.

I am wondering if the Owl has been experiencing the same when she was here. And now i fully understand why she left.

My mother-in-law has ironed every single piece of clothing I own, and my husband is not talking to me, cos I'm pissed off with it. Instead, he decided he's going to buy himself a big a$$ boat from a boat show to compensate for my mood swings.

I had a 4 course dinner last night, just when i am desperately trying to lose weight. And don't make it sound like a good thing!!! Try to say No to a meal that a person cooked and waited for you to arrive home to a nicely arranged table with all the colors of the rainbow, except purple (Thank Goodness, she doesn't know that there's a purple cauliflower for sale at Pak'n'Save now). Being the Nice (yeah right) person that I am, of course I had to try all 4 of those that were put in front of me, finish them right after such kind comments as "if you don't like it, don't eat it, please take something else". So I stuff my mouth, and produce as many Mmmmm sounds as possible between mouthfulls and during.

I am extremely angry and I don't think that's going anywhere.. Have developed a nice headache, but can't even go home, cos it's going to be more of Mmmmm - thank you! ARRGGHH... somebody help me!

Now i sound like a mean you-know-what.. but i'm just tired of it all, that's all. This is not a good place to vent, but it feels so good that i don't care.

Whew... feels good to vent...

On a good note, dear Owl, we missed you so much. I personally have missed your inspirational attitude and your calming presense. I miss you and your pfff-typical comments.

Perhaps we could meet up for lunch with the WHOLE bunch of people next week? Your fav - empire?

This is no place to chat, but definitely organize stuff :).

Cheers everyone!

Pasta

The poor Owl must have fallen of her perch to make her cancel our lunch appointment. Must have been a bit serious as she had to quickly rush out and take an appointment with the avian dentist. (I know birds don't have teeth smartypants, I just put it there to make it more interesting!) Maybe next time Ms. Owl, I'm sure the food wouldn't have tasted nice anyway with the thought of italian food crawling into your molar cavity afterwards.

Anyway, we still ended up eating at our fave Italian place. The pasta was great but the conversation wasn't very pleasant. It was mostly about the company restructure and the different techniques you could use to call in sick. One of them was pouring water down the toilet while on the phone with your boss. Don't even ask me what sort of sound that's simulating.

Oh, and Rayana did try to pronounce a couple of Italian words which unfortunately came out sounding German.

The Owl is wondering ....

... is nobody having lunch since Rayloc has swanned off to Las Vegas?????

It is not healthy that you aren't eating.
Even less healthy that you aren't blogging.
Even less healthy for the unemployed Owl who spends hours each day logged onto BAFL hitting the refresh button and there is no news!!!

OK - I'll give you some news. Well - life is great. I get up each morning (without that awful pit in my stomach that I have to crawl through traffic for over an hour) and then I.......I um....well I....I sort of like......well.......you know......well I check BAFL......and then I......well I make another coffee......and then I like........well I check email......and then I check nzherald......and then I switch on TV and watch the news and then I like.....make more coffee and drink it on the deck whilst having a ciggie and watching the sunrise. I do enjoy sunrises - I never noticed how beautiful they are you know - all those colours that you can't actually describe. Actually, I've been making up names for some of the colours - my favourite is crushed strawberries :) And I also like vanilla butter and orchestra violet and stewed blueberries (I promise I'm just smoking normal cigarettes!).

Well anyway - after the sun has risen and the symphony of colour is over, I make some more coffee and then I ...... well I refresh BAFL and usually feel most disappointed. Sometimes I return to the comfort of my duvet with a book, sometimes I read the jobs on SEEK, then after laughing hysterically I return to bed. Sometimes I do housework and plan the evening meal. I have come to enjoy the daily trip to Foodtown on my mission to gather ingredients for the evening cook up. I am rediscovering the beauty of garlic and herbs and had no idea there was such cool and amazing things to buy in the way of foodstuffs. Amazing what wonderful products they've invented in the last couple of years that I've never seen when I whizz through the aisles at 100 miles an hour with the express purpose of getting out of there and home as soon as possible. I do know the beer/wine aisle quite well and the fast food section - but man - there is so much cool stuff hidden between the toilet roll and personal hygiene aisle !!!!!!!

Well my darlings - as always - you know I miss you heaps. I am concerned about your personal diets and mental wellbeing and would very much like to know what you are eating for lunch (if indeed you are having lunch!!) and what you are discussing.

My love as always
The Owl

Twins.

Another day, another bus ride. This time most of the passengers are school kids from the uni to intermediate.

One of the games I play on the bus is the 'celeb look alike' bus game. Which involves matching as many ordinary bus people with their celebrity lookalike.

I made a celeb match immediately. One of the passengers really really looked like Sanjaya from American Idol. Even the hairstyles were an exact match. Hmmm. Google it if you're curious.

I did see a pair of female twins, which I thought was pretty cool. Apart from the colour of their backpacks, they're all identical down to the dresses and hairstyles they wore. It was pretty fascinating as the last time I saw twins was a TV show called Bananas in Pajamas. I always had trouble telling them apart.

Anyway, they were playing some sort of game where they were licking their fingers and wiping it off each others clothes (and faces). It must the current hip thing that teenagers are playing nowadays. Hmmmm. Things must have changed a bit as I've never exchanged bodily fluids willy nilly, well, not on a bus anyway.

Which made me think of the implications. If they kept at it longer, would the twins merge into one? You know, like twins carry each other's DNA. If they get enough DNA's off each other, would they turn into a single blob of goo or just disappear in a puff of smoke?

Anyway, they did stop afterwards before my theory got validated. Hmph. Perhaps next time.

BAFL-B (Back from Lé Breakfast)

It's a bit chilly this morning as we had a shower of cold rain before sunlight hit. I've been taking the bus lately, which is a whole lot better than driving. It does have it's cons, like noisy passengers, but sometimes worth it if you're not in a hurry.

The bus gradually filled as it made several stops to the city. As the driver drove closer, it was then that I noticed that there were only 7 vacant seats left. And one of them's the one beside me.

During the next stop, I was eyeing the next person as she clambered on the bus. I was half expecting that she's going to pick my empty seat and repress my paranoia. She walked down and did stop by by my aisle, but only to pause and grunt before moving further back to the bus.

"Was it something I wore?" I ask myself. "I took a damn shower this morning you know!!!" I was tempted to shout but thought the better of it.

This happened 2-3 more times, which was very unhelpful to my already small ego.

"Do I look like a serial killer to you? Arghhh!" Perhaps the bloody butcher's knife and ski mask propped beside me gave it away.

Dont' get me wrong though, I don't normally mind if people don't sit with me, but today seems different. It felt like you're being picked on last when the captains choose teams.

Anyhow, somebody eventually took that seat which pretty much shut me up. I happily turned on my ipod and thought of the next thing I'd worry about...

Which, unforutnately, didn't take long as the bus passed through one of the many parks that dotted the city.

Right in the middle of the park were a congregation of ducks, well... congregating. I would have said a 'flock' of ducks but not with the way they were acting. What struck me odd was how they formed a circle around the 'lead' duck who was right smack in the middle - very symmetrical. The oddest bit was all the ducks forming the circle weren't moving, or going about their normal ducky ways. I think they were actually having a meeting! I had to turn my head around just to reassure myself that it's real. Unbelievable! 7am for a meeting.

"Quack!" Says the Duck foreman.

"Now before we start the day, I want to make sure that all the parents look after the baby ducks, ehermm, i mean the ducklings as we dont want any of them wandering about."

"To get to the agenda, here are the parks where duck feeding's popular at the moment." As he points to the key places on his powerpoint slide. "Fly here, here and here and you're pretty much set for the rest of the day."

"And finally, make sure you don't go wandering about any peking restaurants. We all know what happened to Daisy."

I really have to start getting some sleep.

Diary of the Unemployed Owl

Monday:
8.30 am - stir, open eyes, look at the clock.
8.31 am - burst out laughing
8.32 am - roll over and go back to sleep

Tuesday:
9.30 am - stir, open eyes and listen to the rain softly falling
9.31 am - smile
9.32 am - roll over and go back to sleep
10.00 am - wake again and leap out of bed to go and bafl :)